Baby Talk

I commented not too long ago on Kate's blog that for me, pregnancy, particularly very early on, felt like this intense combination of overwhelming responsibility and total helplessness--not wanting to do anything wrong, and knowing that if something did go wrong, there'd be almost nothing I could do about it. This combination produces anxieties about all kinds of things I never would have worried about before--like whether it really was okay to eat brie at the Christmas party yesterday (really, what are the odds that our school's food services actually served imported, unpasteurized cheese?). So it always gives me a special little high to go to the doctor, as I did today, and hear the baby's heartbeat and know that everything's officially copacetic as of now.

Of course, it's much better in recent weeks because she's moving around constantly (and big enough for me to feel it), even on her slower days. Like yesterday, she was a little quiet.

"Are you okay in there?" I asked.

"Oh yeah," she said, yawning her teeny mouth, not bothering to open her eyes. "But with all the holiday running around we've been doing, I just needed to take a day for myself. You know, relax, kick back."

Apparently, babies actually dream before they are born. What does she dream, I wonder? That I've eaten a big meal? That my stomach is rumbling or my heart is pounding or I'm standing in front of the bright worklight? That all the poking will stop?