Almost a Form Letter

This time around, I decided to play my response with sheer incredulity. You probably don't even need to see this student's email to understand what he's asking for, or why he wants it.

Dear ___,

Hmm . . . are you asking me to just change your grade--simply because you'd like a higher one? No, I can't do that. It would be wrong, I think, to raise students' grades so that they can make the Dean's list--after all, that is an honor, and it is supposed to signal what students have *earned*, so doing so would defeat the purpose!